Fear

Fear is one of the oldest and most profound emotions that humans can experience. Evidence suggests that its roots are so ancient that we share neurological and behavioral features with the first vertebrates, dating back several hundred million years. Just as it did then, fear operates today as a defense mechanism, aiding in the detection of threats and triggering avoidance behavioral patterns. In a harsh evolutionary environment, our long-gone ancestors improved their chances of survival by being able to feel afraid. This adaptive feature became so successful that nearly all vertebrates today show evidence of some kind of fear response. 

Every emotion serves a purpose, and although cultural and personal predispositions may lead us to dislike negative emotions, living a healthy and full life requires finding ways to relate to the entire emotional palette. The functionality of fear can be understood as signaling: [whatever is happening now] I need more protection. 

Even in an environment where our physical survival may not be at risk, we can still experience strong fear responses when confronting diverse challenges at work, at home, or when dealing with the social complexity surrounding us.

Uncertainty

Barring becoming a predator’s next meal, few things can trigger fear like dealing with uncertainty. Nonetheless, our modern way of life often demands that we show up and deliver, despite not having the full picture or not knowing the next step to take. It might be an important project presentation, standing our ground confronting an abusive neighbor, or becoming vulnerable and authentic with a loved one. 

Frequently, the tension associated with this paradoxical situation may manifest as a feeling of being blocked. In some cases, the blockage can be so severe that one becomes fully paralyzed, unable to act or speak, and even incapable of retrieving memories about events and knowledge one knows well. Similarly, one may find oneself caught in a cycle of endless scenarios, running into multiple loops, or engaging in activities unrelated to what one is supposed to do.

Confronting fear and uncertainty

Then we may ask, how are we able to tame fear, confront uncertainty, and feel less blocked? One approach is to frame fear by realizing that it is not an undifferentiated mass, but rather, it can be structured with definite features. As we move toward fulfilling our desires, we can define different stages in the process of dealing with fear, which will correspondingly determine the work to be done.

Based on my own experience and expertise, I have devised an approach to help my clients structure and understand fear in a practical manner. This approach has proven effective in developing strategies to overcome fear paralysis. It has also shown applicability in creative endeavors, helping bridge the gap between coming up with an idea and its realization. A crucial concept to bear in mind is that the various stages in confronting uncertainty demand different attitudes and actions to facilitate an optimal workflow.

In the following points I will give a description of the stage, explain a main challenge, describe a common mode of failure, and the key to advance in the process towards realization.

STAGE 1:  DESIRE

The initial stage is that of desire. It all begins with the apprehension of a desired outcome that is not yet materialized. This could be an idea for a business, a desire to compose music or poetry, or a project one wishes to undertake. At this initial stage, all the work lies ahead, no-thing has been achieved yet, and everything is potential. A main challenge associated with this stage may be the perception of too many possibilities, which can lead to feelings of overwhelm or paralysis – Which path to take? What decision to make? One way to fail is to give up before even trying; after all, avoiding personal involvement may seem like protection against risk. However, it also guarantees a lack of success. The key to overcoming fear in this stage is to learn to tolerate not knowing the exact path toward fulfilling our desire, but rather to become content with understanding the general direction.

STAGE 2: DIVERGENCE

The second stage increases the probability of success by expanding the number of possible paths to fulfill our desire. This may involve a brainstorming session, exploring new avenues of thought, or evaluating potential synergies with other existing processes. This stage is characterized by free association, generation, and divergence; it involves transitioning from nothing to many possibilities (many, yet a finite number of potential paths). One way to fail is to attempt to combat uncertainty by judging any individual path based solely on its perceived likelihood of success or viability. This stage is fundamentally dynamic and non-linear, marked by unexpected turns and fragile yet important insights. The key here is to bring an appropriate level of protection to the creative, divergent process; protection from judgment and overly logical reasoning.

STAGE 3: CONVERGENCE

The third stage complements the previous one. It increases the probability of success by narrowing down the number of possible paths to fulfill our desire. This stage involves assessing the pool of potential paths generated in the second stage, taking into account present limitations and demands imposed by the broader context. This stage may require exercising judgment based on previous experience, discarding overly unrealistic paths, or selecting among several viable options. It involves narrowing down many possibilities to a few. One way to fail is to remain attached to too many ideas or paths, being unable to let go and thus stalling the process. The key here is to be aware that the necessary narrowing of possibilities may be experienced as a loss, eliciting feelings of discomfort, sadness, or even pain. Consequently, it is important to remember that fulfilling a desire requires making choices, and that choosing always involves letting go of something desired in order to realize another desire.

STAGE 4: SYNTHESIS

In the fourth and final stage, all the work comes together to produce a single outcome that represents the culmination of the effort and the fulfillment of our desire. This stage results in the synthesis of all previous work cycling back to our desire and it is characterized by resonance with the original desire – Are we satisfied with the final outcome? Is it a good representation of the original burst of inspiration? One way to fail is to become overly idealistic, refusing to integrate limitations that may feel too restrictive; being the final stage, there is always a risk that the outcome may not be satisfactory. Unlike earlier stages, the current stage lacks the opportunity to rely on subsequent work to address any shortcoming. The key here is balancing acceptance of realistic limitations with authenticity regarding the original desire.

Conclusions

We have seen that fear is a powerful emotion, and when framed, it plays a decisive role in our lives by mediating our perceived need for protection. Yet, it still remains a challenging feeling that often makes us feel unequipped to safely contain it and thus benefit from its valuable lessons.

Here, I have presented a practical method that encourages a more constructive relationship with fear and uncertainty, leading to heightened awareness that reduces the likelihood of feeling blocked or paralyzed. By structuring our approach to fear, we may better recognize potential failure modes and take effective actions to advance our desires.

If you’re eager to transform your fears into allies, I’m here to listen. I would be happy to work with you through your challenges, and help you move beyond any blockages standing your way.

Evans, D. (2003). Emotion: A very short introduction. OUP Oxford.

Adolphs R. (2013). The biology of fear. Current biology: CB, 23(2), R79–R93. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cub.2012.11.055